Prop Bets for the Chinese Rocket Crash

| May 7, 2021 6:33 am PDT

The Chinese rocket March 5B is hurtling towards Earth uncontrollably and is expected to crash into the planet. The Communist Party claims it will burn in the atmosphere and and will be fine, but many experts don’t think that’s the case.

It seems most likely that the rocket is going to crash at some point during the upcoming weekend, but it is hard to estimate where and when exactly.

Since online betting sites offer odds on pretty much everything nowadays, I decided to speculate on some potential props they might release if they decide to cover the event.

The Rocket to Crash in Los Angeles

Let’s start with the prop wager on where the rocket would crash. No one really knows for sure the final destination of March 5B, but almost anything is possible at this point.

Most experts tend to rely on scientific methods when they try to calculate the landing spot, but I suggest a different approach.

The Los Angeles Clippers just completed a rare regular-season sweep against the Lakers and there’s a strong case that this is the main favorite for the NBA title right now.

LeBron and AD have been struggling with injuries and other teams are depleted too.

Knowing the history of the franchise, it would be no surprise if a Chinese rocket crashes in Los Angeles to end the Clippers’ NBA championship ambitions.

Bitcoin to Crash Before the Chinese Rocket

The cryptocurrency world was interesting mostly only to tech geeks a few years ago, but everybody and their dog has some Bitcoin nowadays.

After going almost straight up for more than a year, the most popular cryptocurrency is bound to crash at some point and we’ve seen it happen before.

The rumors for the Chinese rocket that’s about to crash could serve as a timely reminder that life is short to many holders. If they decide to sell their BTC and start a spending spree, the currency will drop immediately.

Bitcoin is crashing before the Chinese rocket, you heard it here first! The odds for this one should be astronomical too, so it would be one of the best props.

China to Deny the Crash After It Happens

The Chinese government already said that the rocket should burn in the atmosphere, so there will be no crash after all.

Most experts are convinced in the opposite, but we know how stubborn that state can be.

If there was a prop bet on China’s reaction after it’s all said and done, I would firmly place my money on the government to completely deny that the crash happened at all.

I would probably put a side bet on blaming the CIA for the accident, just in case! The problem is that the prices for both options won’t be too high, but winning is almost guaranteed.

Alex Jones to Blame the Democrats

I am not sure if Alex Jones truly believes in most of the things he says or he’s just trying to provoke. Either way, the man is a master of bombastic conspiracy theories and I would be eager to see his reaction.

My money is that he will somehow blame this on the democrats. The other potential options for this wager could be a pedophile ring in Hollywood, aliens, or crab people.

The choice is tough, but we all know that Jones can’t miss this opportunity to pin it on the Democrats.

I expect him to find the connection between Hillary Clinton, Berny Sanders, Obama, and the Chinese rocket after preparing with a bottle of whiskey.

The Democrats to Blame Trump

If you are looking for a sure bet, this is the one! The democrats might have gotten rid of Donald Trump in the 2020 election, but he’s still their favorite target when it comes to pointing the finger.

I’m sure that the upcoming Chinese satellite crash will be no exception. I expect all the talk show hosts to dedicate their time to show the connection between the former US president and how his actions led to the incident.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez will prepare a recovery plan with the help of Al Gore and everyone will calm down.

Joe Rogan to Host Chinese President on His Podcast

I don’t know how he does it, but Joe Rogan somehow manages to get all kinds of celebrities on his podcast.

I expect him to invite Chinese President Xi Jinping to comment on the rocket’s crash and he will oblige. The two of them would spend hours commenting on all sorts of topics from life and will end up becoming best friends forever.

US president, Joe Biden, would then offer the comedian a post in his administration to use his close ties to Jinping to improve the connections between the USA and China.

Hollywood to Make a Movie by the End of 2022

We know how Hollywood loves true stories and disaster movies. Well, the film industry will have the chance to combine both and create a movie based on the Chinese satellite crash almost instantly.

In fact, I won’t be shocked if all of the biggest studios release their own version of the story.

The 2022 box office and Academy Awards will be dominated by movies about the Chinese rocket crash and there will be plenty of lawsuits over the rights to the story.

Wrap-Up

What interesting Chinese rocket crash prop bets can you picture?

We know that the betting sites have a lot of imagination, so I’m sure there will be some great bets available if they decide to release odds.

Let me know what your ideas are in the comments below, I will be happy to read every suggestion.

If any site IS going to offer prop bets for the rocket crash, MyBookie is the most likely. They are consistently among the best sites for prop betting.

Here’s a full list of our recommended sites for prop bets. Any one of them may end up offering betting on the Chinese rocket.

Jerry Summer

Jerry Summer has a wide-ranging interest in gambling and the gambling industry. He's made a living out of both playing poker and betting on sports.

The English Premier League and the NBA are among Jerry's primary areas of expertise. He's knowledgeable about many other sports, too, along with poker and several casino games.

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